Have a Ball: Rocky Mountain Oysters' History and Tradition.
This blog and recipe were contributed by our Food Innovation Lab Graduate Student, Jade Umberger.
My hometown, Mount Sterling, IL, has a population of about two thousand people. On one weekend every summer, that number would increase drastically as visitors came from all over to attend the local bar’s Testicle Festival. The Sportsman's Tavern has hosted the annual event since before the current owners can even remember. Initially held as a customer appreciation celebration, area farmers would bring in leftovers from springtime calf castration and have a big fry up at the bar. It became a tradition, then obligation, passing down through generations of owners.
Nicole and Tim started at the Sportsman’s as bartenders in 2006, one of the largest years of the Testicle Festival. After working at the tavern for six years, they became owners in 2012. If you ask them about their most challenging moments of the festival, they’ll talk about the year that they processed two hundred pounds of bull fries by hand. If you ask about their best moments, they’ll talk about community. Volunteers for the event were mostly loyal customers, paid for their time with a T-shirt and free beer. Other volunteers came from local nonprofits like Brown County Against Cancer or the Brown County Public School Music Boosters and were given a portion of the event proceeds as a donation. One of the more popular events was the drag queen contest in 2003, which supported communities that were not seen often in rural areas at that time.
The Sportsman’s Testicle Festival’s last year was in 2017, but dozens of testicle festivals are still held around the country every year: from a Turkey Testy Festy held on Thanksgiving weekend in Huntley, Illinois, to an Annual Father’s Day celebration complete with an all-you-can-eat contest in Ashland, Nebraska. Even more restaurants and venues offer testicles on their menu. You can find them at Colorado Rockies’ home field in Denver and even on a brewery menu as an ingredient in Wynkoop’s Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout. While you’re in Denver, order some Rocky Mountain oysters at the city’s oldest restaurant, the Buckhorn Exchange. However you take part in this prairie tradition, you’re sure to “have a ball.”
An Offal Lot of History
The first Olympic athletes believed that eating testicles raw would help them perform better in competition, and the Kama Sutra suggests eating them mixed with milk and sugar helps with libido and stamina. In ancient Greece, the consumption of testicles was one of the first known records of athletes doping for performance enhancement. Aretaeus of Cappadocia, an ancient Greek physician, spoke of the effects of testosterone-rich testicles, declaring that their consumption “contributes to health, strength, courage, and generation.”
Millenia later, during Westward expansion in the US, testicles were a source of extra calories along the trail for cow folk come springtime as young bulls were castrated to control breeding herds. In cattle communities, farmers and farmhands cook up testicles for a snack on their branding iron stove while herding calves through fences for vaccination, branding, dehorning, and, for the lucky young steers, castration. This tradition has led to modern celebrations of Rocky Mountain oysters held throughout the country at small-town festivals and as kitschy restaurant specials. Tourists visit to try the novelty sometimes served alongside cocktail sauce. However, these oysters don’t come from the sea.
Although the name comes from their oceanic cousins, the only thing they have in common are their preparation methods: battered and deep-fried. Rocky Mountain oysters usually come from veal or bull, depending on if they are harvested at castration or at processing. Before preparation, chefs must remove the outer membrane before cutting into nuggets or slices. A simple breading of flour will do, or if you’re feeling fancy break out the cornmeal. Best served hot.
Recipe
Ingredients
2-3 pounds of veal testicles, frozen
3 eggs
1/4 cup milk
1 cup flour
1/4 cup cornmeal salt
pepper, and other spices to taste
Method
About 30 minutes before preparation, set the testicles out to semi-thaw. While they thaw, prep wet and dry batter bowls. Mix together flour, cornmeal, and spices in one bowl. Whisk together eggs and milk in the other.
After 30 minutes of thawing, use a sharp knife to make a shallow incision lengthwise down each of the testicles. This should make it easy to remove the membrane surrounding the meat. Then, slice each testicle into disks, about ¼ inch thick. Thaw fully in a bowl full of salted water for about 10 minutes. Meanwhile, preheat oil to 350-375°F.
Dredge each thawed disk in egg mixture, then flour mixture and immerse in hot oil until golden brown. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. Serve.